There is a long road of recovery for those whose spouses had an affair, and that counts if you get a divorce after cheating. Some people are willing to look past their partner’s mistakes, but others decide to move on with their lives instead.
It’s important to know that California is a “no fault” state when it comes to a divorce. This means that neither party has to prove that the other did anything wrong or immoral to cause the divorce, and it won’t come into account when determining the distribution of marital assets, alimony, or child support.
If you decide to get a divorce, it is wise to seek legal advice from a divorce attorney, especially when you seek compensation.
Should You Get Divorced After an Affair?
There are many reasons people decide to get divorced after their spouse had an extramarital affair. Here are the most common reasons:
- Trust is broken completely.
- Underlying problems surface.
- Feelings of rejection are prominent.
If a divorce agreement can’t be made, it is best to speak with an attorney, as an uncontested divorce will obviously not be the right option here.Always remember that you have legal rights to use the assistance of an experienced family lawyer or divorce attorney.
Factors to Consider When Wanting to Divorce:
A traditional contested divorce isn’t cheap. It can become lengthy, with long waiting periods in between. A divorce attorney can help you get precisely what you need and will know how to present the argumentsin court.
Before you decide to file for a divorce, consider these things:
- The quality of the relationship: is it possible to mend things?
- The past: as much as you shouldn’t relive the past, look back and see if your partner has done the same thing before.
- The reaction from your partner: how did your spouse react when confronted? This is a very crucial factor, as a negative response or emotional abuse is a sure sign that the relationship is failing. If your spouse is remorseful, on the other hand, something might be salvageable.
- Your emotions: emotions are challenging to decipher, so take some time to decide how you really feel about the situation. Hate is normal, but indifference is more worrying.
Making It Work
If you’ve decided to make it work after finding out about your partner’s infidelity, there’s a long path of healing and fixing that lies ahead.
It’s important to take some time for yourself during this hardship. Process your feelings and allow yourself to feel those emotions. Communication is key here, even though it was likely lacking before. Be honest about your feelings and be direct so your spouse knows exactly what you’re going through.
It’s always good to seek support, like a therapist, to help steer through the challenges you now face. Trust exercises and communication skills are usually taught during this time. You and your spouse will also be asked to think of how things will be moving forward in the marriage. This includes anything from setting boundaries to counseling to couple activities.
Will an Affair Affect the Divorce Settlement?
Unfortunately, in California, an affair doesn’t affect the divorce settlement. California is a no-fault state, therefore you don’t even have to state a reason for wanting to get divorced. On the one hand, that does make things a bit easier, but your divorce settlement won’t be affected by an affair.
An affair can cloud judgment, and decisions can be made based on emotions. It’s therefore important to include a divorce lawyer in your divorce proceedings. Contact Westover Law today to hire an experienced divorce lawyer to help with your divorce after cheating.