Divorce could be confusing for children, even when their parents reinforce the fact that the decision had nothing to do with them. Following the separation, children often have to spend time with their parents in two separate households. Although it might be challenging for California parents to put their ill feelings for a former spouse aside in the interests of their children, there may be great rewards in store for those who can accomplish it.
Except in extreme cases where child custody & visitation is restricted,, no parent should interfere in their child's relationship with the co-parent. The bond between a child and their parent is separate from the connection the two adults share. Undermining the other parent, discouraging visits or sharing unnecessary details about the divorce with a child could backfire on the offending parent. It's typically more effective to allow a child to discover flaws on his or her own.
Divorced parents should set clear limits for their children. Ideally, expectations should be consistent in both households. Having this consistency could lessen the contact divorced parents need to have with each other during the time they are both dealing with the emotional stress of the breakup. As parents form new romantic relationships, it's important to encourage any new spouses to take on the role of assistant to the parents. In this role, a step-parent may be seen as supportive to the children instead of a person moving into their home to make new rules.
While it may not be easy, it is often possible for two adults to co-parent their children in a mature, respectful manner during and after the divorce. An experienced child custody & visitation lawyer might provide additional tips and advice to help facilitate the transition for the children and give them the opportunity to maintain a healthy relationship with both parents.